Elf boy and the attack of the Poison Ivy
by trinity4
Summary: Sequel to Elf boy gets a cold, elf boy gets into a bit of trouble with some poison ivy and its Dr. Aragorn and his scary home remedies to the resuce again.
1. Prologue: -Look before you sit-

Title: Elf boy and the attack of the Poison ivy  
  
Author: Trinity/lee  
  
Summary: The sequel to Elf boy gets a cold, we left Legolas in a pile of Poison ivy I believe so lets go see what happened after that.  
  
Authors note: Well I couldn't decide whether to do a sequel to Elf boy gets a cold or a Boromir fic. So I decided to do both. I'll update this story every Sunday and my Boromir fic: Snappy dressing dude gets hit on the head, every Wednesday. So anyways here it is.  
  
Chapter 1: -Look before you sit-  
  
Legolas sighed as he hiked along behind the rest of fellowship. He was red and itchy; his normally smooth elvan skin was now completely covered in red patches which he craved to scratch. He was however well aware of Aragorn's eyes upon him as he walked, the ranger had dropped back from the front to keep a close eye on the elf, and looked at him disapprovingly when ever he attempted to scratch. So the elves hands hung loosely by his sides, his long fingers occasionally twitching.  
  
The whole ordeal was made more difficult by the constant snickering of the hobbits as they turned around and looked at him and the comments Gimli kept making about the skill of wood elves these days.  
  
Legolas still coloured in embarrassment at the thought of how foolish his actions had been, he was also sore, not only from the Ivy but about the fact that he had just survived the flu. Right this moment he should be the epitome of health, instead, due to his blinded he was the epitome of the red, the puffy, and the itchy.  
  
Aragorn had gathered herbs as the ingredients for the cream as promised. When he had returned from the forest he had been about to begin preparing it when Gandalf had came over and announced that it was finally time to leave.  
  
When Legolas's predicament was brought to light, and the hobbits had stopped rolling about on the ground laughing, the wizard had begun to entertain the idea that perhaps the fellowship ought to stay a little longer.  
  
"No!" the elf had adamantly replied "We have lost too much time already," he said, as the hobbits tried to compose themselves "I am not the bad at any rate and we have many orcs to fight, if we do not do it who will? There could be villages out there which are crying for our help…" Legolas stopped when he found he was staring at three unconvinced faces, two attempting to stifle their laughter, and another two which had lost the battle all together and were back on the ground.  
  
Legolas sighed, "And Aragorn has some…" he shuddered "cream". The ranger nodded his head in agreement, and it was decided they would be able to leave that day.  
  
"But first" the wizard said "you can make use of some of this cream of Aragon's"  
  
Ruefully the elf nodded and the ranger began to prepare the herbs. The elf nervously went and sat under another tree, checking twice that the ground was completely bare.  
  
He watched Aragorn as he tat stirring the pot. Merry and Pippin wandered up to the ranger and commented on the wonderful things you could do with herbs' Snickering behind their hands as they looked at the elf.  
  
Aragorn finally finished mixing the herbs and made his way over to Legolas. The ranger knelt in front of the elf ad began to roll up his own sleeves.  
  
A look of horror crossed the elves face when the ranger told him to take his shirt off. He wrapped his arms about his chest tightly.  
  
Gimli suddenly materialized behind the ranger, Legolas was surprised at the dwarf's ability to sneak up on him lately, perhaps he was rubbing off on the stout creature who a year or so ago he could have heard coming over an army of screaming Orcs.  
  
"You would think you were a girl the way you carry on elf, he's not going to hurt you"  
  
The ranger was securing his sleeves at the elbow  
  
"Yes, this isn't painful Legolas, it should help to ease the itching." I wouldn't think an Elf would be afraid of a few herbs.  
  
Legolas thought back to the other remedies Aragorn had used on him in the recent past and decided he had a lot to fear from the man's potions. With extreme reluctance the elf removed his shirt and allowed the ranger to kneel behind him.  
  
Aragorn, placed his hands in the wooden bowl and scooped out an amount of the glutinous paste, and smacked it on Legolas's back.  
  
The elf gave a shrill yelp.  
  
"What?" Aragorn asked, looking up.  
  
"C…c..cold" the elf replied and began to shiver as the ranger began to rub the cream in  
  
"I thought elves were immune to the cold" the dwarf again interrupted  
  
Legolas glared at him and was about to make a scathing remark when Aragorn put some more cream on and he yelped again.  
  
Legolas had suffered the treatment and they were now on the road again, Legolas reassured himself that the cream had worked and that he felt no inclination to scratch. Subconsciously Legolas's hand began to creep over his arm.  
  
The ranger's hand suddenly reached out and slapped the elf's away.  
  
Legolas looked at the man with increasing annoyance and then refocused on the road ahead.  
  
* * *  
  
As the sun rose hight above them the fellowship paused for lunch. They had seen no sign that Orcs were near and it would please the hobbits to be able to rest and feed. As the company settled down the eat Legolas excused himself and snuck fugitively into the forest.  
  
Once he was hidden by the trees he grinned and began to scratch himself all over, sighing in relief. This he did for ten minutes or more when he heard the sudden snap of a twig. Swiftly he was on his feet, bow drawn and ready in his hand.  
  
He relaxed when he realised it was only the ranger and replaced the bow and arrow.  
  
"Is something wrong Aragorn?" the elf asked the silent ranger innocently.  
  
The man looked at him menacingly and roughly took him by the arm and lead him back to where the rest of the fellowship rested.  
  
"Ow" Legolas said reproachfully as he was pulled through the undergrowth.  
  
Aragorn lead the elf back and stopped by his pack, and stoped, pulling out something Legolas couldn't see out.  
  
The elf, fearing it was more cream tried to flee but found that the rangers grip only tightened The dark hair man straightened and spun the elf around, grabbing his slender arms and pinning them behind his back.  
  
To his horror Legolas realised that Aragorn was binding his hands behind his back! The ranger pulled out the length of rope and deftly and * tightly * bound the elves hands.  
  
Though he struggled like a cat in a trap Legolas realised that the rope was tied too tightly to slip out of. The elf gasped and spluttered, too enraged to think of anything to say.  
  
Legolas wondered briefly how the ranger had learnt to bind an elf so well, but his thoughts slipped to the mans bedroom life with Arwen and a horrified look crossed his face and he quickly snapped back to the present situation.  
  
Aragorn turned the elf to face him and Legolas, finding he had use of his voice again yelled  
  
"What do you think your doing? Untie me at once!" his blue eyes were flashing  
  
"So you are free to scratch?" the ranger asked  
  
The elf reddened when he realised he had been caught in the act and his anger was quickly extinguished.  
  
Aragorn led Legolas over to where the fellowship sat, eating theiir lunch and pushed the elf down onto his knees.  
  
"How am I going to eat?" the elf said indignantly  
  
The ranger picked up a bowl and spoon and grinned.  
  
"Open wide" he said  
  
  
  
-Next chapter: more bondage, lol, and some terrified villagers, but wait, they're not terrified of Orcs, they're terrified of the red splotchy elf boy! Lol ok please review, you know I live for the reviews, and they still make me write faster. 


	2. Chapter 1: -Trippin through the Villiage...

1 Chapter 2: Trippin through the village  
  
As the sun was setting over the small mountain range in the distance, the fellowship were just approaching the gates of a small city, surrounded by high white walls which sparkled with the reflection of a large blue lake.  
  
The hobbits especially were impressed, though the city was nothing to rival Rivendell the surrounding countryside was beautiful and the walls were bright.  
  
Legolas though, was not in a position to appreciate this, Aragorn had released his hands on sight of the city but was still keeping a close eye on him. As he walked at the back of the fellowship scuffing his feet in the ground, head down, he did not have a chance to admire the view.  
  
Had he looked up though, his sharp elvan sight would have noticed that there were many pockmarks in the glittering white walls and the tall iron gates had sustained some damage.  
  
It was not until they were closer that the fellowship were able to observe these things.  
  
The walls looked as if the city were at war, though the alert guards standing by the gates let them in easily enough.  
  
Once within the walls they were overcome by the normal noise and bustle of the city, merchants advertised their wares, shoppers navigated the stalls and horse drawn carts ferried passengers through the streets.  
  
Gandalf and Aragorn stopped several people and came back with the same answer as to what had damaged the city: monsters, foul, evil gruesome ones at that, which had smelt of death. They had been making nightly attacks on the city, destroying their crops and orchards and attempting to break down the walls and the gate. It was clear to the fellowship that this was the work of Orcs.  
  
Despite the busy atmosphere it was plain that the city folk were nervous and afraid.  
  
Gandalf had decided that they had better find the leaders of the city, to see if they could ascertain where the Orcs were coming from.  
  
Just as they were passing a food stall Legolas paused as the smell of baking bread reached his nose causing his stomach to growl hungrily.  
  
He had refused to allow Aragorn to spoon-feed him, and all the rangers' attempts had earned him a fair amount of food over his face and shirt.  
  
Now it was Legolas who was paying, as hunger pangs assaulted his stomach. His head rose sharply and he eyed some of the bread hungrily. Briefly he was wondered if Aragorn would permit them to stop so he could buy some, when sudden pandemonium broke out around him.  
  
A woman screamed, as Legolas looked up at her he was surprised to see that she was pointing at him. Soon others joined in. And the entire market place was in uproar.  
  
Legolas looked about himself in bewilderment, what were they screaming about?  
  
"Monster!" the woman yelled as she pointed  
  
Produce began to fly at the elf, and before he knew what was happening, fruit, vegetables, and eggs were flying towards him. He managed to duck an unlucky chicken that was also thrown his way.  
  
As the pelting of all that was handy began to cease, Legolas saw that soldiers, alerted by the cries were closing in on him.  
  
The elf wondered what he should do, he couldn't fire an arrow in the crowd and Aragorn had confiscated his knife when he had caught him attempting to sever the rope with it.  
  
He was spared the indecision when Aragorn ran up behind him and grabbed his arm; he was having similar problems with the close proximity of the crowd.  
  
"Run" he suggested, and pulled the elf behind him with a lurch as they dashed through the streets.  
  
Luckily it did not take them long to lose the soldiers in the crowded streets, despite the screaming citizens.  
  
As they huddled in a dark and narrow ally Aragorn looked up at the elf, Legolas supposed he should have expected what he did next as it seemed that lately the world was against him, and his elfish pride had suffered greatly. The ranger began to laugh, though quietly so as not to attract unwanted attention. Silent tears ran down his face as he stared at the elf.  
  
Legolas stood dripping with fruit pulp, egg yolk and chicken feathers, a single drop of yolk dribbled down his face and off his nose. This only caused the man to laugh harder before he finally pulled the elvan cloak from his pack.  
  
At this Legolas looked at him questioningly.  
  
"I need a bath! I'm not cold"  
  
"It's your skin," Aragorn explained, " they think you're an Orc"  
  
Legolas face scrunched up in disgust " I look nothing like an Orc, red patches or no!"  
  
"They're frightened, how good a look do you think they had of the Orcs? Now just put this on and make sure you cover your face"  
  
Legolas did has he was bid and before long one man and one slight cloaked figure dripping a suspicious viscous yellow substance mixed with tomato seeds and feathers walked out of the ally into the street.  
  
"Now we just have to find the others" the ranger said "I hope they're not in too much trouble"  
  
* * *  
  
Pippin and Merry looked about themselves, the city dwellers appeared to have calmed down somewhat, though troops of soldiers still patrolled the area.  
  
They had become separated from the rest of the party in the chaos. They'd been enjoying the sights and smells of the city when suddenly there was shouting, and soldiers began to run towards Legolas. Aragorn had also ran towards the elf while Gandalf, Gimli, Frodo and Sam had attempted to halt another troop of soldiers who had came up from behind.  
  
The two hobbits had decided to lend their swords to the elf and man and so had raced off in that direction. However when they arrived on the site, only broken eggs, pureed fruit, and one bewildered chicken indicated that the elf had ever stood there.  
  
Surprised, they had turned, only to find that the rest also had seemingly vanished.  
  
After searching for what they deemed a considerable time, they found themselves back at their starting point.  
  
Pippin looked about in confusions, still looking for the others, only to find nothing. Merry did they same though he did not come up with naught.  
  
"The others are lost perhaps, but I'll bet they are safe, Frodo and Sam have Gimli and Gandalf and Strider and Legolas each the other, what is to stop us from having a few pints?" the hobbit said with a smile as he gestured to a tavern to their right.  
  
Pippin agreed heartily, after all, this searching worked up a thirst, and whistling a merry tune they walked into the tavern.  
  
* * *  
  
Legolas and Aragorn had been searching the city for hours. They had travelled almost every street. But all attempts to enter buildings had failed. Legolas was beginning to smell quite putrid now that the eggs and rotten fruit had been heating in the sun for awhile. Apparently this not a welcome smell to have on your door step, and they had, had several doors slammed shut before Aragorn could even utter the first syllable.  
  
They were just now back at the site where they had lost the rest of the fellowship, Aragorn walked a few paces behind the elf and was subtlety trying to cover his nose with his cloak.  
  
"This is not getting us anywhere," the elf said sullenly as he swiftly turned his head around, trying to catch the man in the act of covering his nose. Aragorn had removed his hand and now grimaced only slightly as he spoke to the elf.  
  
"Yes I suppose coming back here was not the best way to …"  
  
The ranger was interrupted when a nearby tavern door was flung open and two small figures were thrown onto the pavement.  
  
The small creatures sprang up and ran to the now closing door and shook their fists.  
  
"We're not children you rotten swine" Merry cried now banging on the closed door  
  
Pippin stopped and his eyes began to water.  
  
"You know I think we must be near the sewage, it doesn't half smell bad around here"  
  
Merry turned to look at him and in turn saw Strider and a … cloaked figure from which the smell seemed to be emanating.  
  
"Strider, we've found you at last," he said loudly, grinning  
  
Pippin turned around in surprise  
  
"Yes we've been going to great lengths to search for you" Pippin agreed, smoothly switching from outright anger to outright lying.  
  
"I can see that" Strider said as he looked at the tavern "come help us search for the others, do you know where they went?"  
  
"No, er …… who is your friend" the hobbit asked  
  
"Its me" the cloak hissed  
  
Merry looked taken aback and tried to peer under the hood  
  
"Oh yes, it is, is it?"  
  
"I'm Legolas" the cloak said with annoyance as the elf pulled back his hood and then quickly put it back on again once the hobbits had seen who he was.  
  
"Oh good" said Pippin " We thought you might have been a Hobo Strider picked up"  
  
Legolas glared at them  
  
"Come on lets get moving" said Aragorn, trying to diffuse the situation.  
  
They began to walk down the street once more, everybody keeping a tactful distance from the elf.  
  
"So Legolas, when are you planning on having a bath?" asked Pippin  
  
"Aragorn, can I have my knife back?"  
  
The ranger passed it to him and the two hobbits wisely shut up  
  
  
  
Next week's episode, we find out what happened to everyone else and they all get together again, there is a council about the Orcs, which Legolas can't attend for certain, reasons.  
  
Oh and also the itching intensifies.  
  
Lol also try reading my other work "Snappy dressing guy gets hit on the head" Primary a Boromir fic but also features in large parts, Aragorn, Legolas and the hobbits.  
  
As always please review, for questions comments, or anything. 


	3. Chapter 2: -Why is that Orc looking at m...

1 Chapter 3: Why is that Orc looking at me?  
  
*A few hours earlier*  
  
Gandalf, Gimli, Frodo and Sam turned to face the soldiers which now approached them from behind. Pippin and Merry had run after Aragorn, whom the wizard saw over the crowd, was running towards Legolas.  
  
Gimli and the hobbits each had their weapons drawn and were tensed ready to attack when Gandalf unexpectedly told them to halt.  
  
A man dressed in gold and blue robes walked forward from behind the soldiers. His face broke into a smile when he saw Gandalf and the two embraced. Gandalf greeted his apparently old friend and motioned for the hobbits and Gimli to follow as the man dismissed the soldiers and began walking down the street. Frodo and Sam looked at each other and shrugged, following Gimli, the wizard and the robed man.  
  
* * *  
  
Legolas headed the group, if only because nobody else would come more than six feet near him. He sighed  
  
Something caught his attention as they again returned to the spot where they estimated Gandalf and the others had been standing  
  
"You say they turned to fight another troop of soldiers?" he asked the hobbits  
  
They nodded in agreement.  
  
"I'm quite sure but, Aragorn would you come here a moment"  
  
The ranger looked at where the elf was pointing and crouched down low, placing one hand in front of him.  
  
"No blood" he said as he looked up at Legolas understanding.  
  
"You would think someone would shed at least some blood, Gimli is particularly lethal with his axe and I can't imagine any of them would have been taken prisoner without a fight" remarked Legolas  
  
"I don't suppose you could track them on these cobble stones?" he asked.  
  
The ranger shook his head  
  
"Lot of good you are then," said Pippin. Merry punched him in the arm and Aragorn and Legolas ignored him, pondering the new signs.  
  
* * *  
  
They had been walking about the city unsuccessfully for a number of hours, the hobbits were complaining of sore feet and the sun was now a narrow blood red rim on the horizon. All the city folk had retreated in doors and increasing numbers of soldiers were appearing looking apprehensively at the sky and gates.  
  
At first the increase in soldiers had forced the party to take the less travelled routes through the city, but when it became apparent they were paying no attention to Legolas they relaxed their guard somewhat.  
  
One young soldier though did start to approach them but crinkled his nose and backed away, cautioning them at a distance that it was not safe out of doors, "especially for kids," he had added, this had earned him some dark looks from the little ones in question and the soldier made a hasty retreat  
  
They had decided they would help if the Orcs attacked tonight and they now circulated close to the gate where most of the soldiers were at, a number more stood at the battlements and Legolas climbed up to them and drew out his bow, settling in for a long wait.  
  
The other archers looked at him in distress and moved a few paces away from him.  
  
Aragorn, Merry and Pippin remained on the ground, though Aragorn was wondering if he wouldn't have a better position on the battlements. The city seemed to have adequate resources so he surmised it must be a large number of Orcs indeed that were attacking.  
  
It was not much soon after the sun had set that the dark figures of Orcs could been seen outlined over the horizon in the dying light.  
  
Once they were within range Legolas and the other archers began to fire, nearly half the foul creatures numbers were felled before they even reached the wall, a large proportion of that could be attributed to Legolas.  
  
There was a great number of Orcs indeed. They came in the dozens. As they approached the gate the soldiers at ground level fought them off with sword and spear. The hobbits were able to squeeze between the soldier's legs and fight the Orcs at an even closer to ground level than the men, and they managed to severe many a foot and tread on many a toe, only occasionally were they those of the soldiers.  
  
Though both the soldiers on the ground and the archers in the battlements seemed to have the upper hand, Legolas was experiencing some problems  
  
He had tossed his cloak aside as the Orcs drew near, much to the distress of his fellow archers who had moved even further away from the elf, causing those at the end off the wall to loose their footing and slip. The remaining archers seemed to envy their fallen comrades and stared at Legolas in fright before the arrival of the Orcs had caused them to redirect their fear.  
  
Legolas had killed near a dozen Orcs when he began to notice something. The Orcs did not seem interested in attacking him, at least not in the traditional sense.  
  
He looked about himself at the other arches and saw that they were having to occasionally stop in the middle of shooting to aim at a closer target which was trying to disembowel them.  
  
Legolas was not having the same problem, at least not in the disembowelling sense.  
  
The Orcs may not have wanted to attack him but that didn't mean that they didn't find him interesting.  
  
He jumped another pair of hands which groped at his legs and then springed over another. The elf let off a quick succession of arrows which momentarily stopped them, but it was not long before he was once more playing the skipping game.  
  
He was suddenly caught off balance as his foot was pulled out from under him and he landed on his back, the impact knocking his bow from his hand. The orc had him by the leg and with its foul mouth it seemed to leer suggestively at him.  
  
"I'm not an Orc!" Legolas yelled and kicked it in the face with his other foot.  
  
"Not a boy one and defiantly not a GIRL!" He cried, kicking it extra hard on the last word to emphasis this point.  
  
The final kick caught the orc square under the chin and he was propelled off the wall. Legolas got up again only to be knocked down once more, this time the Orc, having witnessed his companions failure in courtship seized the elf by both legs.  
  
Legolas reached for his knife when the hand seized him about the wrists. Legolas stared at the Orc horrified as it uttered a word in it's own tongue, from the look in its eyes Legolas felt that it was probably "MINE"  
  
The Orc began to drag the helpless elf off the wall.  
  
A look of complete surprise followed closely by rage crossed the Orc's face as an axe cut off its hands, it then promptly fell backwards off the battlement taking several of Legolas' other admirers on out the way down.  
  
"Lucky I was here" said a voice a few feet above Legolas' head.  
  
Legolas looked up in relief at the Dwarf that offered him his hand which actually only brought the elf half way up, he retrieved his bow and again took up his position, this time with more confidence as he had Gimli at his side.  
  
Once the battle was over and the Orc bodies lay rotting in the sun, the fellowship was reunited.  
  
Gandalf enlightened them as to how they had ended up being captured by Gandalf's old friend, and luckily head of the city council, Roinu, and how they had been searching for them in the streets when they had finally spotted Aragorn standing at the gates.  
  
He also told them that Roinu had informed them that there were many more Orcs hiding somewhere in the countryside and that there was going to be a council meeting which was to be held tomorrow morning.  
  
Legolas ad Gimli sat with their backs leaning against the wall.  
  
"Looks like you beat me again Legolas, I killed only a dozen, for some reason they just seemed to be throwing themselves at you."  
  
Legolas shuddered suddenly, he then remembered that they had been invited to stay at the councillor's home and he had been promised or rather been made to promise that he would have a bath. He was looking forward to it.  
  
Something suddenly occurred to him.  
  
"Gimli" he began "Why have you not commented on my…….. state?" he questioned suspiciously.  
  
Legolas expected the dwarf to be the first person to tease him about it, he mused as he picked yet another piece of egg shell out of his hair.  
  
Gimli looked at him in surprise  
  
"I thought it was some sort of new elvan body and hair treatment"  
  
Legolas relaxed, ignoring the actual remark, at least there had been nothing more sinister behind it than a bad line. He learnt his head against the wall and closed his eyes, not even grimacing at the squelchy noise.  
  
  
  
-Next week: once he has had a bath will Legolas' suffering finally be at an end?  
  
Of course not, I'm trinity lee, and besides, remember the poison Ivy?  
  
Comments, questions, suggestions, please review. 


	4. a brief message

I'm really sorry, but due to the exams there wont be any new chapters for a couple of weeks, but after the exams I will resume updating as before. Sorry, but I am in year twelve and these are pretty important exams. But I really love writing so u can expect me to be back! 


	5. Chapter 3: -Cleaning up and setting off-

Well exams are over and my marks are back, some bad and some good. I am also back to continue writing if anybody is left who is still looking for updates. I apologise profusely for the delay and hope that you will forgive me, but anyway for those of you left..on with the story.  
  
Chapter 3: Cleaning up and setting off  
  
Legolas lay back in the warm scented water and sighed in contentment as the morning sun shone through the window. It was his fifth bath since they had been invited back to Roinu's home and the elf was finally satisfied that the evil funk which had invaded his hair and skin was gone.  
  
His clothes too had been washed and pressed and lay folded on a chair across from where the elf reclined in the water.  
  
There was to be a council meeting held with the elders that noon, but to Legolas that seemed a world away.  
  
As he relaxed his left hand moved to his right and absentmindedly began to scratch it.  
  
Legolas slowly opened his bright eyes and stared accusingly at the offending appendage. As he looked up he caught his reflection in the mirror and heaved a huge sigh at the wet spotty toad which stared back at him. The poison ivy's affects did not seem to be abating, after he had been cleansed of his foul coating he again longed to scratch it. As he stared at his reflection he noticed his hand now creeping up to his shoulder and hastily splashed it back into the water.  
  
He must try not to think about it. Elvan will power he thought and looked about himself for that elusive soap on a rope  
  
* * *  
  
At noon the fellowship stood before the council of elders, headed by Roinu. Aragorn and Gandalf discussed with them the Orc's threat and where the cities army had determined their base to be.  
  
It seemed to Legolas that they were also discussing new creatures which sometimes arrived with the Orcs though the elf was distracted and took little of this in.  
  
As Aragorn, Gandalf, Gimli and the hobbits shared their knowledge with the elders the elf's mind was concerned with the persistent and seemingly perpetual itchiness of his skin.  
  
It took all of his will to even look engaged in the conversation. It was in fact maddening.  
  
Merry, who stood beside the elf looked up and noticed Legolas's transfixed smile and to his surprise the prince seemed to be developing a twitch.  
  
Strider had begun to discuss tactics when Legolas further surprised the hobbit by suddenly breaking out of his motionless, twitching state and starting to madly scratch himself all over.  
  
Legolas had suddenly snapped, and discarding all decorum had sought to ease his pain. He was now enthusiastically scratching his legs through his leggings when he felt a tap on his shoulder.  
  
He looked up and quickly skipped over Aragorn's annoyed yet disturbingly sly gaze and turned to see the council starring at him perplexed.  
  
He slowly straightened and addressed the council, trying to regain his equanimity.  
  
"Ah, Aragorn you were saying?" he said and looked imploringly at the ranger.  
  
Aragorn took pity on the elf and launched back into the discussion. The elders dismissed Legolas's behaviour as a peculiarity of people from distant lands. Elves were virtually unknown in these lands, appearing only occasionally if some what obscurely in some bedtime tale, noted mostly for being fair of voice and light of step. After the visit of the fellowship they were there after also remembered as being spotty of face and neurotic in behaviour.  
  
The council of elders had decided with the fellowship that they should ride to the west to the base of the Orc's refuge.  
  
The company readily agreed but declined their offer of men.  
  
"We must help you some how" Roinu had exclaimed and had followed by proffering mounts to the company. This offer was accepted, most readily by the hobbits, who felt they had walked enough in the recent past for several life times. It had also been decided that Gandalf should remain in the city to protect the it should the Orc's attack again before the fellowship had sought them out.  
  
.  
  
The town healers, knowing nothing of elf physiology could not help the prince.  
  
When Sam had politely asked over dinner what elvan healers had done in similar situations Legolas had somewhat reluctantly replied that there had never been a similar situation. Gimli had snorted his drink and loudly claimed  
  
"No other elf has been dull witted enough to sit in it!"  
  
Sam had wisely kept his mouth shut for the remainder of the meal.  
  
After dinner every one had returned to their rooms for they were to leave early in the morning  
  
Legolas though had slipt away before the meal was finished on his silent elvan feet. He was particularly weary and had not trusted the look on the rangers face after he had been caught scratching.  
  
He crept as quietly through the halls and his foot steps were not even heard by the mice in the walls, nor was his departure noticed by anyone in the party. This was probably aided by the fact that they were for the most part quite drunk.  
  
Slipping past a final pair of guards he quickly opened the Oak door of his room, slipt inside and closed it again with a quite * snick * of the catch. Leaning his back on the door he sighed in relief.  
  
It was then that he heard a small noise and opened his eyes to see the ranger sitting on his bed grinning broadly. He lifted his arm to show the elf the jar which he held in his hand and his grin widened even further. The elf's eyes widened in fear and his mouth formed a silent 'o' of horror.  
  
Back in the passageway the guards were startled by a sudden cry from the elf's room, much like the sound of a cat which someone has just thrown in the bath tub.  
  
Shivers ran down their spines as they recalled the tales of the soldiers of the spotted-pointed eared creature which had felled a great number of Orc's as if they had been lamb's and then the tales of his comrades of how the same creature had suddenly gone berserk while standing before the elders. They looked at each other in the light of the torches and decided that neither of them were paid enough to go into that room and instead leant back against the wall and tried to ignore the subsequent shrieks.  
  
* * *  
  
The next morning the fellowship was presented with its mounts.  
  
Aragorn was handed a large blue roan, while Legolas was given an elegant grey mare. The hobbits were each given a pony and even Gimli, who had previously been accustomed to riding with Legolas, was given a stout shaggy black mountain pony. Despite his misgivings about horses the dwarf seemed to like his new companion and his complaints were minimal.  
  
Legolas was already astride his mare. He rode up to Aragorn who was packing his own horse with much baggage.  
  
"I should be careful Aragorn" the prince said "strong as he is I don't think that horse can carry both you and all that baggage"  
  
The ranger simply smiled at Legolas in reply and continued to secure the packs.  
  
Legolas raised and eye brown and road off to check on the hobbits.  
  
The hobbits, who for the most part were accustomed to riding ponies in the Shire were trying to give the dwarf some pointers on steering. Though Gimli had frequently been a passenger on Arod he knew little on how to control a horse of his own. Despite his apparent (and baffling,) affection for the shaggy black beast Gimli was still reluctant to leave the ground.  
  
The hobbits though had persuaded him on and he was quite successfully getting the creature to obey him.  
  
As Legolas felt his presence was not required here he urged his mare back to where Aragorn was still loading his horse.  
  
"Aragorn!" he exclaimed with laughter "You will never be able to ride him! There isn't' even room for you to get on!" he said with mirth.  
  
The man did not seem phased but again looked strangely at the elf.  
  
"That is alright" he said "I don't plan to" and with that he sprang onto the back of Legolas's steed and took the reigns from him.  
  
Flabbergasted Legolas tried to glare at Aragorn but found it was difficult to do so to a man sitting directly behind you.  
  
"What are you doing?" he cried.  
  
"Keeping an eye on you Ivy boy"  
  
Legolas couldn't' tell if Aragorn was getting more disrespectful or if it was just the events of late. He had to admit that Aragorn did have a point though and after yesterdays meeting with the elders…  
  
"At least think of the poor beast" Legolas said  
  
"You are as light as a feather my friend, I doubt that she is troubled much" Aragorn replied with a smile  
  
"Why am I continually bester with by you?" Legolas groaned as the ranger urged Legolas's horse forward towards the rest of the fellowship.  
  
The hobbits, Legolas saw, would not meet his eye but he could see their shoulders shaking with laughter.  
  
Gimli who had been in a similar position on Arod offered no support and so it was in this manner that the fellowships bid goodbye to a chuckling Gandalf and a sniggering crowd of villagers and set off into the distance.  
  
Next chapters: Up into the mountains or at last along the rode. Please review as not only do I love reviews but I also need them to see what u like and don't like and to decide what I am going to write in the next chapter so be kind and review 


	6. Chapter4: -Why not to insult a dwarf-

O.K any one who is left, don't kill me, I'm so sorry, but here it is. I just hope there are some people still reading this  
  
Chapter 4: Why you don't insult dwarfs  
  
The sun was rising over the intimidating peaks of the distant mountain range. The fellowship had been told was named the Traube. The mountain tops glistened in the early morning light, adding to the majesty of the surrounding landscape. The paved road the fellowship had first taken on horseback had petered out to a flat dirt track. The horses were moving over it at a quick pace, the dust flying up behind their hooves as the fellowship admired the land scape. Occasionally the revered silence was interspersed by the mumbled complaints of an irate elf  
  
"I don't feel this is fair to the horse"  
  
"You said that already"  
  
"Yes but look at the strain visible in her face" Legolas continued The grey mare whickered gently and turned her head to face the elf who was addressing her. She licked his nose with her large wet tongue. Legolas pretended this hadn't happened and started another line of argument to propose to the obviously amused Ranger sitting behind him.  
  
"I don't see why I should be forced to sit here in front of you on this horse like I was a...a" the elf trailed off.  
  
"..a dwarf?" Gimli picked up for him "It's good enough for me but not for you your royal highness!" The rest of the company were surprised at the sudden anger evident in their companion's voice. They hadn't seen Gimli this annoyed at the elf for a long time. Legolas immediately apologised but it fell on death ears and the dwarf simply urged his dark pony forward leaving a flabbergasted elf in his wake.  
  
* * *  
  
The atmosphere about the fire that night was awkward as Gimli sat opposite from Legolas glaring at him with the fiery gaze of a hundred elf hating fore fathers Legolas was simply trying to look apologetic since all attempts to actually apologise had been ignored and the dwarf had began to make threatening movements with his axe. Aragorn was amazed at how quickly the situation had deteriorated, sure, dwarfs and elves had been enemies for untold years but Legolas and Gimli had forged a friendship in spite of this. The hobbits, usually sensible creatures had, to add to the difficulty, taken sides in the argument. Contrasting the silence of the previous two, their arguments rose above the flames.  
  
"He's nothing but a stuck up snob" Merry shouted  
  
"And *he's* nothing but a ground dwelling mole! Pippin shouted back  
  
"Why you guttersnipe!" Merry grabbed Pippin's shirt in his fist  
  
Before the Hobbits could come to blows Aragorn rose and separated them, picking them off the ground  
  
"Alright, now every one stop it" he barked "Merry, Pippin, Sam, Frodo, all of you go back to the same side of the fire. And Gimli , Legolas has apologised enough, you move too!!" The hobbits sheepishly returned to the same side of the fire. Gimli remained  
  
"Gimli!" The stubborn dwarf simply remained on the spot  
  
"Not until he grovels"  
  
Legolas' face darkened, elvan pride flaring up again  
  
"I do not grovel.." he began "especially not to the likes of you"  
  
The ranger could tell this was not going to be resolved easily. As the fire was extinguished and the fellowship began to go to sleep Gimli announced he was going to take first watch. Under the pretence of checking on their mounts the dwarf checked to see everyone was asleep. With the elves it was hard to tell so he waved a hand in front of Legolas' face, the blue grey eyes didn't even flicker Grinning, the dwarf implemented his plan.  
  
* * *  
  
Legolas woke up to the usual red fierily itchy torment he had been waking up to the past week. Trying to resist the urge to scratch he peered around the darkened camp site looking for the Ranger. As much as he disliked the cream Aragorn had made, the itching was getting steadily worse and he was sure it was driving him insane. Perhaps I can warm it over the fire, the elf mused as he spotted the Ranger and made his way stealthily over to him. Kneeling down and searching the Ranger's pack, a small frown dawned on his face. Where was it? He looked at the slumbering Ranger for a second Maybe the man was lying on it? Legolas thought hopefully. Rather than wake Aragorn, Legolas gently pushed him until the man rolled over, unfortunately since they were on a slight incline the ranger didn't simply roll over but instead continued to roll down the small hill out of camp until he was abruptly stopped by a tree. Unfortunately not even Aragorn could sleep though this and he awoke with a start, drawing his sword and looking about warily  
  
"Uh, Aragorn", Legolas waved at the Ranger. "er.. sorry about that, I don't suppose you would know where the cream is would you"  
  
Still confused as to how he had gotten down the hill he ranger nevertheless sheathed his sword and approached the elf.  
  
"It should be in my pack" he said and picked it up to rummage about in.  
  
"It's not"  
  
The man creased his brow in thought. "I don't suppose we could have left it back at the city could we?"  
  
"No, I saw you packing it" the elf replied.  
  
"Hmmmm" the ranger pondered. "Well I doesn't matter, I can simply make some more," he said, pulling out his mortar and pestle and reaching for his herb pouch. A quick search of it confirmed that they were out of the particular ingredients needed.  
  
"Something suspicious is going on here" Legolas nodded in agreement. "And I have an idea who"  
  
Before Legolas could stalk off in search of the dwarf Aragorn grabbed him by the elbow. "Legolas" he said in a warning tone. The elf glared at him for a minute and then sat on the ground at the foot of a tree, checking for any suspicious three leave plants first, of course.  
  
The ranger had some quick words with the hobbits and then set off, taking the grey mare.  
  
Legolas was sitting with his head in his hands looking broodily at the forest floor. Suddenly a number of shadows fell across the ground and he looked up. There stood four hobbits, since he was sitting down, they were successful in towering over him, or at least being above head height.  
  
"Now, we don't want any trouble" said Merry  
  
"What?" the elf asked  
  
"Strider said we were to look after you and make sure you don't do any harm to your self" Said a grinning Pippin  
  
"So just don't scratch Mr Legolas" Sam put in and the Hobbits left.  
  
Legolas remained sitting, plotting what he would do to the dwarf which had yet to show its face. However, poison ivy is a rather maddening thing and before long he was frantically scratching. The rising sun was darkened and he looked up to see four hobbits standing in from of him with little hands on their hips  
  
"..." Said Legolas in surprise  
  
"What do we do master Frodo?"  
  
"I don't know"  
  
"Well what would Strider do?" asked Pippin  
  
* * *  
  
"LET ME DOWN!" screamed Legolas.  
  
The enraged elf struggled against the ropes which bound him spread-eagled against the tree. The hobbits looked on placidly as the elf bucked against the restraints in screaming in fury.  
  
At that point Gimli materialised from behind the bushes and grinned at the prince behind the hobbits back. This seemed to make the elf more furious and he started screaming in elvish. The hobbits with the exception of Frodo who was grimacing slightly, were glad that they didn't speak the language.  
  
Luckily for Frodo's ears the other hobbits decided it was time for breakfast and left the elf to his own devices. Gimli stayed a short time longer, grinning infuriatingly before following the hobbits.  
  
Legolas, now alone, finally calmed down and stopped yelling. Thoughtfully he tested the rope, it had been bound tightly at the wrists and ankles by each of the four hobbits. Deciding to call on his magical elvan ability to commune with nature, Legolas tried to persuade the tree to bend so he could free his hands. Unfortunately for Legolas, the tree hadn't seen an elf in years and was quite enjoying the company. Starved for attention it tightened its branches around him. A pair of red squirrels did however come down from the boughs and decided to perch upon his head. An impassive elvan expression settled over his face  
  
* * *  
  
When Aragorn returned it was some time after noon. He had been able to find all the herbs he needed. As he entered the camp he found the hobbits asleep around various food scraps. It looked like they had eaten half of their food supply. Neither Gimli nor Legolas were anywhere to be seen.  
  
"Gimli! Legolas!"  
  
Gimli walked out from the eastern side of the camp  
  
"Where's Legolas" the ranger inquired  
  
The dwarf simply pointed at the western side of the forest. The confused ranger headed off in that direction. He found the elf bound to a tree, two squirrels nesting in his hair. As he began to walk towards the elf he realised he was giving him the evil eye.  
  
Legolas shook off the sleeping squirrels who scampered back up the tree and continued to glare at the Ranger.  
  
Aragorn had been trying not to laugh and a smile quirked at the corner of his lips as he finally reached the elf unbound his arm and legs. Legolas rubbed his wrists.  
  
"It's a bit extreme I'll admit." Aragorn trailed off as Legolas stormed off in the direction of camp  
  
"I hope he doesn't do anything too disabling to the hobbits" said the ranger and trotted after him.  
  
The tree alone again, sighed with disappointment as the squirrels settled back into her branches. 


End file.
